M2s Claim Derby Rights

This match report is sponsored by Sam Boseley, your DoD today.
The pitch was set, sticks were raised, and the air crackled with...well, more anticipation for the social this evening than anything else. But amidst the feisty competition, this hockey match delivered some of the best hockey the 2s have played this season; proving that sometimes, when you play hockey well, you tend to enjoy it more.

Pre-Game Antics:
* Lappin the Love Doctor: While others set off to warm up, Lappin honed his charm, attempting to woo an unfortunate lady on the sidelines. Did Cupid's arrow find its mark? The report remains silent.
* Pitchside Pantomime: Alex and Soli, the future of Sonning Hockey Club, staged their own mini-match while the previous game dragged on. Were they right in being told off by a South Berks spectator? Yes, definitely yes.

Match Highlights (and there were many):
* Aerial Artistry: I counted 10 50 yard aerials from Oscar, showcasing his impressive skills and putting myself to shame.
* Greeny's Jammy Goal: Greeny, perhaps distracted by Lappin's charm offensive, didn’t make a sweet connection, but somehow made its way into the goal.
* Accidental Hero: Oscar with a delectable pass, set up Beef Stewart (yes, you read that right) for a deflection as unintentional as it was effective deflection goal.
* Pessimistic Pete's Panache: Not to be outdone, Pete scored a goal so stylish, a delicious deflection from a short it could only be described as "sixy." With a smirk that now haunts Gaz’s nightmares.
* Santa's Little Helper: A festive deflection from Santa added to the charm of the match.
* Patzi's Power Move: Patzi unleashed a reverse tomahawk, to put a 6th past South Berks.
* Beef's Butterfingers: Just when we thought the game was over, Beef Stewart whiffed on the ball at the final whistle, providing an unfitting end to the match.

Post-Game Reflections:

* Caffeine Conundrum: The author, decided to make a refreshing coffee during match teas - only to pour tea into his coffee, which tasted as bad as it sounds, and got a deserved DOD for it. Chaos? A metaphor for life? You decide.
* Cramp Calamity: Pat fell victim to a cramp, reminding us that even the most skilled players are human (and prone to embarrassing muscle spasms).
* Soli the Grounded: Soli, apparently saving his aerial theatrics for another day, remained earthbound throughout the match. Was it a strategic decision, or a fear of failure? The world may never know.
* Lappin's Cricket Conundrum: Lappin, channeling his inner cricketer, attempted a beautiful middle edge that sailed off the end of the pitch. Was he aiming for a four, or just showing off? The jury's still out.

So, there you have it: a hockey match where the goals were plentiful, and the laughs were also there. From accidental deflections to questionable beverages, this game had it all. And while the game will go down in Sonning 2s history: this handsome crew of hockey players knows how to have a good time, on and off the pitch.

Hockey love, and your Dick of the Day, Boseley x